Lots of Jokes....

Joke # 1

Isn't Disney World a people-trap operated by a mouse?

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Joke # 2

Helpdesk

A customer couldn't get on the internet.

Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password?

Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.

Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was?

Customer: Five stars.

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Joke # 3

Q: What is worse than being a bachelor?

A: Being a Bachelor's son

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Joke # 4

Sit on lap

A little girl says, "Grandpa, can I sit on your lap?"

"Why sure you can," her grandfather replied.

As she is sitting on grandpa's lap she says, "Grandpa, can you make a sound like a frog?"

"A sound like a frog? Well, I guess Grandpa can make a sound like a frog."

The girl says, "Grandpa, will you please, please MAKE a sound like a frog?"

Perplexed, her grandpa says, "Sweet heart, why do you want me to make a sound like a frog?"

And the little girl says, "'Cause Grandma said that when you croak, we're all going to Disney world!"

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Joke # 5

Route 66

Two good friends are out driving on Route 66 and one guy has to take a leak. Being in the middle of nowhere they pull over by some shrubbery and the guy goes to relieve himself.

Suddenly, he screams "Aaagh! A rattler bit my cock!"

"Relax!" says his friend, "I'll go find a pay phone and call a doctor." So his friend drives off and finds a pay phone, calls a doctor and asks what he should do.

"Well," said the doc, "you must cut crosses in the wound and suck out the poison."

"Is that the only way Doc?" asked the man.

"Yes, you must do that or he'll die."

He finally gets back to friend and his friend asked "So, what did the doctor say?"

"You're gonna die, buddy. You're gonna die."

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Joke # 6

Ice-cream

A husband, wife and a son walk into an ice-cream shop.

The dad says, "I'll have a chocolate." The wife says, "I'll have a vanilla."

Then the dad slaps his son in the back of the head and

Says, "What do you want, fat head?"

The lady helping them says, "Why did you hit him in the back of the head and call him fat head?"

The husband says, "There are three things in life a man wants: The first thing is a nice big truck. And you see that nice big truck sitting out there??? That's my nice truck!!!

The second thing in life a man wants is a nice big house. You seen that nice big house on top of the hill on the edge of town? That's my big house!!!

The third thing in life a man wants is a nice tight pussy, and I had that until fat head came along!!!"

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Joke # 7

Q: Who made the first soft drink?

A: Adam -- he made Eve's cherry pop