School Jokes [Very Hilarious]

TEACHER : Maria, go to the map and find North America. MARIA : Here it is! TEACHER : Correct. Now class, who discovered America ? CLASS : Maria! TEACHER : Why are you late, Frank? FRANK : Because of the sign. TEACHER : What sign? FRANK : The one that says, “School Ahead, Go Slow.” TEACHER : John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? JOHN : You told me to do it without using tables! TEACHER : Glenn, how do you spell “crocodile”? GLENN : K-R-O-K-O-D- A-I-L TEACHER : No, that’s wrong GLENN : Maybe it’s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it! TEACHER : Donald, what is the chemical formula for water? DONALD : H I J K L M N O!! TEACHER : What are you talking about? DONALD : Yesterday you said it’s H to O (H2O)! TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago. WINNIE : Me! TEACHER : Goss, why do you always get so dirty? GOSS : Well, I’m a lot closer to the ground than you are. TEACHER : Millie, give me a sentence starting with “I”. MILLIE : I is... TEACHER : No, Millie..... Always say, “I am.” MILLIE : All right... “I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.” TEACHER : Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE? TINO : “My Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time.” TEACHER: “George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?” LOUIS : Because George still had the axe in his hand. TEACHER : Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? SIMON : No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook. TEACHER : Clyde , your composition on “My Dog” is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did you copy his? CLYDE : No, teacher, it’s the same dog!; TEACHER : Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested? HAROLD : A teacher.